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 The real cloning machine. No, this was not just pulled randomly from Google Images. Quit asking. |
001: BONO USES THE CLONING
MACHINE It was a typical day at the Bono Manor: U2 fans clamoring at the gates, twenty-six or twenty-seven children frolicking about (even Mrs. Bono has stopped counting), and Sir Bono himself was just sitting down to check his day-planner. And that's when he realized, he'd been double-booked! At 2 P.M. Bono was scheduled to meet with Vladimir Putin to discuss Russia's contributions to debt relief for Africa.....but at 2:30 PM he'd promised Steve Jobs he'd be at the press conference for the U2 Edition of the new Smell-O-Vision iPod! Things looked bleak indeed for Bono, until he hatched a brilliant plan: he could just clone himself, and the clone could go to the meeting with Putin while he went to the press conference. So he popped over to the Secret Government Warehouse to use the cloning machine there (believe me, Bono knows people). Both meetings went off without a hitch, and no one was the wiser, not even the PLEBA girls. The second Bono still roams the Earth, making occasional appearances down the pub in Dublin, when the real Bono can't go out because he spent too long down the pub the night before. This second Bono has remained glitch-free and is identical to Bono in every way. Even the Edge can't tell the difference. |
 Bono's clone also dresses himself. |
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